9 Jan 2013

I'm still learning (and tired)

What I didn't know about an almost two year old...

I was always aware of bubba's needs when she was little. I read all the books and magazines, knew how to get through the early weeks and months. I was prepared.

But now...

I feel more lost than I ever did before, at nearly two she is an unknown quantity. Her words are multiplying daily and you can see her brain ticking over and her power of persuasion deepening. She is learning the power of words, now she uses different tones to call me, depending on the urgency of her need. A persuasive 'mamaaaaa', a defiant 'NO!' and a pleading 'Pleeeash' if she wants something.

A wobbly in progress!
She hasn't mastered arguing yet but she is reluctant to give up on something once she has set her mind to it. I'm no longer in the driving seat, she makes all the decisions and I just have to follow whilst pretending I'm in control.

I'm not in control...at.all! She knows what she wants and needs. I spend a lot of time compromising with a nearly two year old. It's a battle of polite wills, loads of:
 'no I don't think so'
'please don't stand on that'
'Can you put that back'
'I don't think we do that, do we?'
'Can you sit down please'

It never stops and I'm mostly exhausted, mentally. I go on a roller coaster of emotions daily (sometimes hourly) and each new day brings more challenges and self doubt. Perhaps it's the time of year but its getting on top of me and the fears and doubt are taking up valuable brain space.

I've just got to work on my negotiating skills.

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