14 Aug 2013

My Security Blanket

I have been known to moan (fleetingly) about how little time I have as my toddler is constantly under my feet. If I go to toilet she wants to follow and if I go out to the kitchen then after a few seconds she is there, seeing what I'm doing. It's all very sweet and I'd probably hate it if she was uninterested in what I was doing but sometimes, just sometimes, I feel a bit smothered by it.

I never realised though how I do exactly the same to her, I have to most of the time because she is a toddler and often getting up to mischief if left alone. When we are out and about though, she makes me feel safe, I always have someone to hold, to talk to and to look at in those awkward moments.

We've had a few appointments recently where someone else has been holding Bubba and I've felt strange and instinctively reached out for her. Not because she wanted or needed to come to me but because I felt unsure in the situation and wanted my security blanket. Each time she didn't come to me (typical) and I didn't know what to do with myself and had strange empty feeling arms.

I hadn't realised how lucky I am until now because I'll always have a lunch date, a co-driver (believe me she tells me what to do in the car...the most alarming is when she yells out stop and puts her hand up!) and I'll always have someone to laugh with.

It's something I'm going to try and remember next time I can't do anything in peace, I need her as much as she needs me and I hope that never changes.
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