12 May 2014

Those Early Days

There is a song that I love listening to - Baz Lurhman ' Everybody's free to wear sunscreen' 

It was a graduation speech that was made into song and has some great advice in there along the way. I thought of all the advice I wish I'd been given as a new mother so put together my own list. It isn't all about sleeping when your baby does (something I still haven't mastered with baby number two!)

Be Kind to Yourself...
You are the one who made, carried and birthed a baby. You may not know it all now but you are the one person who knows your baby the best. So what if you didn't get a load of washing on, remember to feed the dog or manage to put makeup on. Did you get to cuddle your baby instead? Yep, well that's all you needed to do.

Trust your Instincts...
Don't let any healthcare professionals bamboozle you with jargon or tell you how to do things 'the best way'. Take their 'advice' on board but don't be a slave to it, if you think it's not working for you or you find a better way, go with it. Same if you think something isn't right, trust your gut. Remember it's your baby so it's your way.

Enjoy your baby...
First time around I didn't enjoy the early days and wish I could go back and cuddle my newborn more. This time around I aim to spoil my baby more and take every opportunity to just sit and look.

Someone will always be doing better than you...
There will be 'that' woman at the school gates, around the supermarket or in a baby class who has lost her baby weight, gone back to work already or has a baby that sleeps through the night. Who cares, good luck to her. Please don't compare yourself to anyone else, you never know what goes on behind closed doors.

Sleep Deprivation won't last forever...
It hurts, really hurts but it will pass. Whilst you are in it, remember to take care of yourself, be kind and eat well. Do whatever helps get you through it, whether that's drinking pints of coffee, sweet treats galore or not doing much at all. Don't do too much or push yourself too hard, rest rather than clean and relax if you can't actually sleep. Sit in the garden with your eyes closed and take a few deep breaths, sometimes it's enough but if it isn't, just remember, sleep will come again.

Lean on family and friends and get all the help you can...
Whether its a cup of tea at your mums or phoning a friend for a chat, every little helps. Remember to get out in the fresh air as much as you can, it helps clear the cobwebs, usually makes your baby sleep better and lets your body and mind focus on something else.

You are not a supermodel...
So don't compare yourself to one. Gisele and Tamara Ecclestone may have been parading around in pre pregnancy outfits as soon as baby was out but it's their job to do this. They have teams of people helping them and making sure it happens and quickly! Many more woman are still in their pregnancy jeans long after the baby is grown, trust me, noone looks back and thinks 'Gosh I should have worked out more to get back into shape quicker' it'd be more 'wow where did the time go, wish I'd have sat down more and really taken in all that my baby is'.
This is me, three weeks after having my second baby. My hair is a mess, I'm still looking more pregnant than not and I'm so tired. Look at the chaos behind me too, I now embrace the mess!

Relax...
So what if your baby is screaming, the toddler is having a tantrum and you've run out of clean clothes. If you leave the house with baby sick all over your shoulder (which you will at some point), don't worry, just relax. Every other mother out there will empathise with you and you are not alone.


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