20 Apr 2016

Wishing....

As a mother it's easy to spend all your time wishing your life away. Wishing the washing pile wasn't so high, wishing that your baby would just take a nap when you needed them to, wishing your toddler didn't have a meltdown in the supermarket, wishing your time was your own again.

Remembering back to pregnancy when your biggest wish was that your baby was born healthy. Then when they got ill and those long nights in the dark wishing they would get better soon. Wishing it was you rather than them suffering as you held them because that's all you could do.

Seeing them go from baby to toddler and wishing they would talk; wouldn't run off; they'd stop having tantrums. Listening to mums and wishing your little one behaved better or more like their kids.

Wishing you'd feel more like yourself, have time for yourself, perhaps wishing to find that vital missing part of yourself. Wishing for a little peace and quiet once in a while.

Then as your toddler turns into an opinionated preschooler, wishing it could all go back to when things were simpler. A time your biggest wish was that you'd get some sleep that night.

As that preschooler starts school and gets influenced by others, wishing that you could get that little bundle of tantrum back. Wishing that they would curl up on your lap and sleep again. Wishing that you were their whole life rather than "but Mrs Jones said that worms don't poo...you're wrong mummy!" Wishing for that long lost silence and a hot cup of tea.

Wishing on a star, throwing a coin in the wishing well, pulling a wishing bone...all these wishes stop you seeing what's in front of you.

Meeting an old lady and hearing that she wished she could have those wonder years back. The best years, the ones that start your family memories off "don't wish it away my dear, it goes far too quickly as it is". The wishes that make you a mother, sets the family unit on its way and propels you all through the adventures.

Wishing you could stop time, bottle the feelings of the best bits. Wishing you will always be able to see, hold and be close to your babies. Wishing them lots and lots of their own wishes and fun and laughter.

Most importantly wishing to never forget all these moments, wishes and wants. 




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